Josh got to and from PAX just fine and in general I feel twitlike for kirking out over what seems like nothing in hindsight. That weekend was kind of painful and reinforced that we need to talk about a few things, but everything seems pretty spiffy at the moment except that he's thousands of miles away. That part's kind of a drag.
I went out with my friend Hannah for our second Super Shopping Saturday adventure. It was a lot of fun, and I'm glad it wasn't just a one time thing. We were both working off a pretty limited budget, but I think we were okay. Just a few things each. I did find sunglasses for the cruise next month and found out that if I order the athletic/amphibious shoes I want to get from Payless I can have them shipped to the store for free. That's a big yay. I also found a hat! It was way out of my budget this trip, but I hope we'll go back for another shopping day in a few weeks and I can snag it then.
My plan was to go and make dinner for my parents tonight. They're far from infirm, thank god, but I told mom about a recipe I'm proud of, she said it sounded good, and I offered to make it. They're not being particularly quiet about how they feel slighted by never seeing me, so it seemed like a nice olive branch. Mmm, olives. But mom's down with a migraine today, so we're going to do it tomorrow. Cocktails & Cosmos is going on at work, and I'd like to go to one someday, but since I have the night unexpectedly free I'll probably just play DS for most of it. The Aunts offered to get a third ticket so I could go see Wanda Sykes with them last night and I declined since I was planning to be with my parents-- I could definitely make myself get up and at 'em/it for that, but it doesn't feel right to ask for something like that.
It doesn't feel right for me to ask for a lot of things, and sometimes that extends to (hopefully politely) saying no when someone's offered something, even something I'd like. I think it's in part because sometimes I offer (and truly I'm on the other side of a time when I usually offered) when I'm really not in the best position to be offering, and I worry that other people might do that as well. I know I can't control what they do, but I don't want them to feel trapped in the way that I did at times, even by people I loved, who I hope loved me. It's a sticky wicket. God, "sticky wicket" sounds dirty.
In Wisconsin next week! A short trip just to get in some time with my favorite man. He was very lovely via text message yesterday night when he was coming home from work, and says he wants to come up with something meatless to make for me to eat. I'm going to try that for a month starting Tuesday: we'll see. I'd start Monday but I'm going to have a breakfast-as-dinner with his parents that night, and bacon's going to be on my plate, and as much as I realize I'm compromising the ethics that make me not want to eat meat by delaying it until after I've gotten to have bacon, it's the way it works for me. Not sure if this will lead to a permanent transition; I wouldn't mind if it did, but it would involve some creativity menuwise, and I'd imagine some superstrict budget control to make sure I could afford to eat. It would be fun to blog about the adventure, so maybe that will be a prompt for daily entries. "Here's my month of ______, followed by my month of _____!"
"Lord love a duck," as my dad would say.
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